can’t breathe

can’t move

can’t sleep

rider of nighttime heaving chests

organ caves aching for breath or sleep or other relief

cased in terror freezing over mechanical powers of punches or pinkies

submitting with trapped up screams to wakeful dreaming death

 at the hands of bruising fingers from shapeshifting dimensions

but so that something other than ourselves might endure abject brain saliva

we named blamed famed framed frantic morning ridden mares the bringers of the demons but

night

mare

the

true

night

mare

inhumanly human intruder

faceless faced the face up facing the underwrithing facade of fears incarnate in familiar form

merrie nachts of dancing rib cages pump to irregular judderbar collapsing heartbeats

searing throats purpled by fingers with the faces of your deepest brightest hopes

ridden by murderous seducer intruder

slinking silent in dim doorways

friend and foe and fiend intruder

leaden weight upon you with starry lethargic winking

mother and brother and Other intruder

somewhere someone must take the blame

for demon lover abducter intruder

smiling from corrupted corners of conscious subconsciousness 

clenching unconsciousness in tight incorporeal fists

night

mare

the

true

night

mare

robbing reality’s treasures

 slipping fully formed untouchable

baleful silent in breathing bedrooms

skulking silent on bounded breathless chests

this is sleep

can’t 

sleep

can’t

move

can’t

breathe

 

_

 

2017

© Nichola Tatyana 

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For all those dear ones who find no refuge in sleep.

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NB: Nightmare, from the Old English mare,  being a demon that suffocates you while you sleep. 

We now call this sleep paralysis.

​

Nightmare in Dutch is Nachtmerrie.

​